you know, i have a little prepared speech

so begins veronica's tirade in the movie Heathers. i'm working on a prepared response to craigslist responses like this one:

where is glenmont? is it near germantown?

to the effect of "who do you think i am, google?" in other words, why are you bothering me with questions you can answer yourself. i'd like the response not to be mean, but to basically say,

Lucky you! You are the recipient of my canned response to questions that can easily be answered by a Google search. Like most people who sell things on Craigslist, I am less likely to respond to people who ask questions I've essentially already answered. The ad includes the information you need. Please query Google, and when you find out the answer to your question, or if I have misunderstood your question, I hope to hear from you again.

alternately,

google knows.